Moving On??

Sa isang relationship, mahirap umasa kaagad na kayo na nga. Kahit taon na ang lumipas at kayo parin, hindi mo parin masasabi na sa huli ay magwawagi ang pag-ibig nyo sa isat-isa laban sa mga pagsubok na pinagdaraanan nyo.

Laging sinasabi na sa isang relationship, dapat matutunan ng bawat-isa na tanggapin ang lahat ng bagay na hindi na maaaring mabago ng kanilang partner or tanggapin mo siya kung sino siya. Tama iyon. Acceptance is a very important part of a healthy relationship pero para sa ikalalago lalo ng relationship ninyo, dapat naroon din ang willingness ng bawat isa na magbago para sa taong kanilang minamahal. Magbago para sa ikabubuti siyempre.

Maraming nagsasabi na "tinanggap ko siya sa kung ano siya" pero ang totoo, ang pagtanggap at pagbabago ay isang prosesong walang katapusan dahil ang pagbabago ng isang tao ay patuloy din. Maaaring ang takbo ng isipan ng partner mo ngayon ay mag iba pagkalipas ng isa o dalawang taon. Magbabago ang kanilang mga priorities at maaaring magresulta sa pagpili ng iba ang kanilang pagmamature.

Sa isang relationship, dapat kapakanan ng bawat isa ang iniisip ng parehong indibidwal. Paminsan kumakarga ang isa ng higit na mabigat na klase ng responsibilidad kesa sa kanyang partner, it ay dahil sa kaya niyang mag sakripisyo at magparaya alang alang sa taong kaniyang minamahal.

Kailangan nating magtiwala sa taong makakasama natin sa buhay, pakinggan ang kaniyang opinyon at timbanging mabuti ang mga posibilidad. Ang mga desisyon ay dapat na pnag-uusapan ng mahusay. Hindi rin naman dapat iisa lang ang nagsusumikap na makipag usap. Dapat pareho kayong may effort na iresolba ang inyong conflicts. Kapag iisa lamang ang gumagawa at nagsisikap, hindi magtatagal at susuko din ang isang iyon at bibitiw.

Mas malakas ang magiging pundasyon ng relationship ninyo kapag pareho kayong kakapit ng mahigpit at magtutulungan sa mga bagay na nais ninyong abutin. Kapag wala ang ganitong klase ng suporta at pag-intindi, gayun din ang pantay na effort na manatiling iisa, mahirap manatiling buo ang inyong relasyon.

Mahirap mag move on at mahirap malaman kung kailan, kaya ipinapayo ko na bigyan mo ito ng kaunting panahon. Bigyan mo ng pagkakataon na makita mo rin sa iyong sarili kung tama nga ang desisyon mong mag move on nalang kesa sa makipag balikan.

Ang totoo, nakapapagod din kung ikaw nalang ng ikaw ang magpapakumbaba at babalik. Kung wala sa isa ang ganitong klase ng pakiramdam, mabuti pang pakawalan mo na lamang siya dahil kung hindi ka naman niya pipigilan, malamang sa hindi na hindi nya deserve ang pag-ibig na kaya mong ibigay sa kaniya.

AFRAID OF CHANGE?

A lot of people are scared to try new things. Basically, they are afraid to get out of their comfort zone. They are afraid to change what they are used to because they are afraid that it would only result to something worse.

If everybody had this type of mindset, nobody would enjoy the type of technology we have now. We are created to change and adapt to change. We need to be able to realize that change could either kill you or make you better and the choice is actually yours to make. The world evolves day after day. It evolves into something that may be a little bit scary but if we learn how to live with it much better if we learn how to benefit from it, we'll be more than survivors.

In the book "Who moved my cheese?" The tiny humans got used to having their cheese in a certain corner of the maze that when the cheese was moved somewhere else, it resulted to panic. This is much like people getting used to how their life works today. Many are trapped in regular paying jobs, afraid to go out there without a retirement plan and medical benefits. Afraid to not rely on their employers. Afraid of independence.

I see things differently. I will never be somebody or the person that I would like to become unless I act on it. God gave me the ability to understand that change is good and I can adapt to it. Robert Kiyosaki's rich dad was right when he said that it makes no sense to work for something that you will not eventually own or leave to your kids.

Every person is a massive source of resource and our ability to make things happen and to process things aren't really given to benefit other people. Your skills and capabilities are being taken advantage of by people who pay you to be your employer. Those people are the smart players. You don't even know them but you work for them. They let their money work for them and they don't let money or anyone enslave them. They are free and they are independent.

Yes yes, you might say that you know that already. Hey, the road there is never easy. Remember the parable in the Bible where the master left his slaves coins? The one that was rewarded was the one who invested it into something and doubled it before his master came back. The one who kept it and let it remain as it is did not get any recognition as well. Our mindset should be like that. We should not be afraid of risks or losing. We should not be afraid to try new things and we should never be afraid to get out of our comfort zone.

You will notice that whenever you get out of your comfort zone and try new things, that new thing will eventually become comfortable enough for you to move to another new thing. Unless you go out there and expose yourself to the risks of life, you'll never know what it's like to lose. Yes, you'll never know what it's like to lose and with this very same note, you'll never know what it's like to really WIN as well.

So get yourself out there! Step forward and widen your space. Do not be afraid to fail because every failure brings you so much closer to success. Getting rich is not a one shot deal, it's your drive to get there that will get you there. There is no such thing as giving up with people that has their goals clearly set in their minds. Let's move towards it one step at a time.

GOD BLESS!

TO SUCCESS!!
See you all at the top.

Couldn't, Wouldn't, Shouldn't...Wasn't

I have tried my best to hide how I feel but I couldn't
I tried to not feel the pain and make it go away but it wouldn't
I want make you wrap your arms around me but I know that I shouldn't
I thought it's easy to not be with you, I was wrong because it wasn't

I asked you if you loved me you answered by "I couldn't"
I asked you if you will ever love me you said "I wouldn't"
I asked you again if you can try to learn to love me you said "I shouldn't"
I then said that I always knew you were the one but you said "I wasn't"

It's hard to pretend that it can be mended when it couldn't
I have laid myself here hoping that my heart would heal but it wouldn't
I still feel for you and I still love you when I know I shouldn't
Wishing that I was the one in your heart when I know that I wasn't

Bothered By Complications

What am I going to do now? You see, today I got caught in a web that I couldn't escape. Sometimes I consider being a Filipino a flaw. It's such a pain that we have the kind of culture that produces the new generation of "Romeos and Juliet's" (I don't mean the romantic part, I'm actually talking about the suicidal part).

I'm a smart woman, in fact it's very hard to find anybody else like me in this world. But why am I having this difficulty? I'm usually rational, I'm usually very sensible. But why is my heart deciding against being right?? Or perhaps being rational? What's wrong with me?

I'm a Minister's kid. A "PK" (Pastor's Kid). Being a PK, my life is so damn complicated. I grew up in a church (that was literal). We literally lived in a Pastoral House behind our church. The stage was my playground. As a kid, the only nursery songs I memorized were the ones that kids sang at church. I was pretty good at keeping a tune. Ha ha! I also loved working on little drawings that developed into pretty good pictures. The first human I drew looked like a box with stick feet and arms and round eyes with no iris. (maybe I originally invented spongebob) hehe. I drew them on these weird collection of children's books that we had. They were stacked on our mini bookshelf. I really enjoyed looking at the pictures and then drawing at the spaces (margins) of the book. I had my drawing join the ones that was already on the book. (what am I talking about???) ha ha. I just started a major flashback. Oh well, I already wrote those and I won't bother deleting it.

I want to understand myself and who I am. Maybe I'd understand myself more if I started studying myself from how I used to remember "me". I have a lot of questions. I want these questions answered. But am I the one to answer it myself.

Hey... I just had another flashback (please stay sane). I used to buy cherry gumballs and eat it until my mouth turned red. I played by the uncemented road and dug holes on the ground. I turned the soil I dug into little hills and I dug through it with my bare dirty hands pretending they were little tunnels through a mountain. I did that and imagined many things until it's almost dark. I didn't care about what time it is. All I knew was that there was breakfast, lunch and then dinner. I so dreamed of making my own tiolet bowl. I thought carefully how they're made. I had this friend who played with me all the time. He lived right accross our house. He created the toilet with me. We started with a tiny hole. I asked him to pee on it and it overflowed so we discarded the hole. Our ideas started to become more sophisticated when the old people started asking us what we're trying to do. I told them that we're inventing a toilet for kids. Ha ha! They thought it was funny so they supported our ideas. Did I already mention that the location of our project was my friend's front yard? When they saw that we were going somewhere since we already dug a deep hole. (deep for 4 year olds) and placed wood over it and concealed the wood with more soil then we decided on the shape of our throne. The old people helped. They created a cemented tiny toilet on top of the hole we dug. I asked my friend (he's a guy) to pee on it and it safely went down. We considered it a success. I just don't know what happened to it after that, since after we're done with it, all I remember was that we plotted to steal the ripe guavas that his mother planted after the dirty toilet project. He he!

Alright, alright... now I don't know where I'm getting at. But hey, this is blogging!! I can say what I want right?

Right now, I'm problematic. This medium is part of the media and I'm still very uncertain if I want this problem of mine published. So I guess these thoughts had something to do with making me feel better. The picture I had here was me and my younger brother at the age where I played with the boys until I got tired and nobody cared.

Understanding What Couldn't Be Understood

EMOTIONS?

However we try, it's hard to understand the feeling that LOVE brings about.

Yes, yes. I know that you're always hearing things about love and probably are starting to get tired hearing about it. Maybe even tired talking about it yourself.

Ha! So here you are caught in a page with ramblings about the same old topic you read about every single freakin' day. But hey, tell you what, people write about it page after page trying to tell people that they've finally cracked it. They've finally found the formula as to how they could explain and understand the meaning of what we all feel. Oh yes, I said we "ALL". Nobody is exempted.

How could we explain something that we don't and couldn't really understand? How can we define something that varies in every persons realization of it?

I'm puzzled many times. How powerful is Love that many could die, kill and hurt for it? How strong is it that it could end the possibility of living a beautiful life? You may define it differently from how I would... actually, I'm pretty certain that you would.

I don't know but it's something that makes our lives go round. It's something that helps us continue and have dreams that we want to fulfill. I'm very skeptical about the idea that emotions can be defined as to where and how they came to haunt or taunt a person.

I can't imagine living in a place that is without these complications. Whenever people explains or expresses how they feel, it would seem to me like they're talking about life itself. As if it is the only thing that ever mattered to them. It's that strong!

So how exactly do we understand what couldn't be understood? Well, what I saw is, you really don't. You just let it be. Which is contrary to what's logical. But hey, isn't LOVE always beyond what's logical? ( at least this is the case for the most people that I know, haha. )

Ciao!